Here's to 2011! Bring on 2012!

You know all that stuff I was going to get done this week?  Yeah, not much of it happened.  I have been relaxing and taking it easy though, but I can't believe how quickly the week has flown by.  Kind of like the whole year.

So, what all happened in 2011?

Stories:

• Could Be Worse, Right? and Offside both started and completed.
• Unexpected Circumstances (started in November 2010) completed
• Same Time Tomorrow, Ms Swan - winner of the Twificpics Pick a Pic Challenge
• What I Want - written for the Fandom Fights the Flood Appeal
• Fearfully Rage - written for the Fandom Fights Tsunami Appeal
• Play By Play - written to help Mal and Leo get their HEA Appeal
• Otherwise Alone - written for the Texas Wildfire Relief Appeal, and currently being rewritten as original fiction
• Tempt My Tongue and Transcendence started and still in progress

Other "Stuff"

• Could Be Worse Right banned from FFN for content violation.  This was likely the second best publicity I ever received.  This also brought me Robin, my fabulous blogger and organizer, without whom this blog would still look like second rate crap. :)  She got the blog set up for CBWR? so the story could continue.
• Michael Sheen on VH1 Morning Buzz reading from the first chapter of Unexpected Circumstances.  This still floors me whenever I think about it.  It also brought fanfiction as a whole a LOT of positive attention.  Hands down, the best publicity I ever received!
• Concubine Gate.  Though at times painful, much like those chapters themselves, I learned and grew from this.  If I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing about the story.  There are times I might have kept my mouth shut, though. :)
• I have put to page over 675,000 words.  DK has beta'd most of that.
• I finally got on Facebook!

Just looking at that list kind of makes my eyes pop out.

Ro put this together on facebook, and I love it!

Gigantic thank yous to DK, my ever-enduring beta, who has had to read through the crap (did you see that number of words up there??) to help me find the gems, and to Robin, for all the blog stuff.  Between the two of you, your tireless work makes me look damn good!  

I also want to wish a happy new year to all the other twific writers who have entertained me this year, and of course to everyone who reads, reviews, recommends, and rewards my work with your presence.

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Vacation Week! Hoh!

I am taking the week off from work!  Woot!  We have no real set plans, though I think we'll hit the go-kart track at some point this week or maybe head over to Great Wolf lodge and play Magi Quest - who knows?  I will definitely be doing some writing, that is for sure.

More Transcendence - most certainly.  I plan on continuing with a chapter or so a day, depending on what else I have to get done.

TMT - I am horribly behind on this one, but hoping to get the next chapter out this week, too.

Also might start working on a little but of a new o/s for the Age of Edward contest - not 100% sure yet, but I have been seriously tempted when people keep throwing pictures like the one below at me on Facebook... I have threatened to do Gladiatorward before, and now I just might have to do it!

Age Of Edward 2012 - It's Contest Time!

The Age of Edward 2012

Chances are you remember this contest from the past two years. It has been a great success, giving authors old and new a chance to participate in a wholly unique sort of one/shot contest: writing an Edward from a particular historical era.

This year the contest will commence on January 2, 2012 and will run until February 5, 2012, at which point all entries must be submitted.

Winners will be announced March 1, 2012.

There are two categories: literotica and young adult (for those who don’t write smut and for those who do).
More info, visit

www.ageofedward.com and check out the 2012 Criteria page.

Meet the judges at:
http://www.ageofedward.com/?page_id=276

Email us at
ageofedward2011@gmail.com

Follow Edward on Twitter – he’s always tweeting the latest concerning the contest:
@ageofedward

Good luck! 

What the Hell Is Broca's Area? AKA Why Ehd Can't Speak?

Broca's Area is the part of the brain believed to be associated with the comprehension of both verbal and non-verbal language.  For the purposes of Transcendence, Ehd is a completely fictitious form of human-like primate (we'll call him Homo-savage, m'kay?), who is pretty much exactly like modern humans except he has no Broca's Area in his brain.

What the hell does that mean, Savy?  I didn't know this was science class!  

What it means is Ehd CAN'T learn to speak.  He just doesn't have the ability.  He's still highly intelligent and capable of learning many things, he'll just never associate the sounds Beh makes with any objects or actions other than their name-words.  He might learn to associate a sound with a desired behavior - that is, he can figure out that if he makes a certain sound (khzz), Beh will put her lips on his and he likes this, but he'll never truly associate the sound with the action like your two-year-old will.

It is very much like your dog, who might learn a whole bunch of commands, but s/he doesn't actually know the word "walk."  That doesn't mean they aren't smart - they'll still pick up the leash and carry it to the front door - it just means they don't have the capacity for language.

So, no matter how much Beh tries, Ehd's never going to speak English or French or COBOL.  It's just not within his capabilities.  He's still a bright boy, though - he'll come around in many ways.  At least he's clean now.

If this doesn't make sense, or you happen to be a neurologist and you're mumbling "bullshit" under your breath, just remember while you're muttering that, I'm muttering "artistic license." ;)

Enjoy!

Ask and Ye Shall Receive! NSFW

Merry Effing Holidays!

Totally unsafe for work manip from Kitkat Cullen on FB of Ehd and his Boar lifting skills.  This is a complete crack-manip, and wonderfully awful!  Scroll down...

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Beh-Beh - you KNOW you want some of that!

I want my TMT!

Now who's old enough to look at that post title and hear Dire Straits singing it?  LOL

Anyway - TMT is severely delayed.  Why?  Because I haven't worked on it.  No BS.  I just haven't managed to do it between holiday prep, real life work, and some of the naughtier Caveward bits.  I've got maybe 200 words of it written. Not too surprising this time of year, really.  I'm behind in most every other aspect of my life, too.  That includes emails and PMs, so please be patient if you have sent me one - I'll probably get caught back up between Christmas and New Years, since I'll be taking some time off of work.  Yay!

Transcendence is still flowing pretty quickly, so I hope to keep up with those short, daily updates.  Never any promises, but I'll try.

While you are waiting for TMT, here's a fic I've enjoyed sort of recently.  Give it a shot if you haven't already!

Terms and Conditions Apply by TheSaintsMistress

There's only one person on this earth that Edward Cullen hates, and that's his boss...Bella Swan. She's cold. She's ruthless and incapable of human emotion, and to Edward's greatest frustration, the hottest woman walking the face of the planet.

I don't usually read WIP.  Somehow, I had this one in my head as complete, and now I'm ticked off I have to wait for updates!  I know, I know - taste of my own medicine. ;)  This is a fun one thus far (that is not sarcasm! hehe), and has some of the best written smut I've seen in a while.

Have a wonderful Thursday!

Ehd is HOT!

Love this pic of Ehd from Bobby over on Facebook.  Ehd is definitely HOT!

If you are having trouble with the link to the latest chapter, just keep trying.  Not sure whats going on at FFN, but it seems to be going in and out.  If you keep trying eventually it works.

Is It Friday Already???

Happy Friday all!  I'm a little behind this week - I blame the holidays.  The next TMT Chapter is off to beta, and will probably post tomorrow.  I think you brave, trusting souls will probably like it, but I'm expecting hate mail as well.  LOL!  How's THAT for a teaser?  If you haven't checked out the reading group on the Robstenlove forums - do!  It's been a lot of fun so far!

I'm heading out to Mr. Savage's company holiday party tonight.  Neither of us is in much of a social mood, so I doubt we'll be there too long.  There should be a new Transcendence chapter up before beddy-bye time tonight!  (That's 11:00pm EST.)

In the meantime, enjoy the beginning of the weekend!

Tuesday Teaser - Tempt My Tongue Chapter 5

Are you ready for a little TMT tease while you await the Transcendence update?

***

I watch from the tree line in the back of Forks High School as Bella sits on a picnic table near the entrance to the cafeteria.  She is wearing a short sleeved shirt, and I am captivated by the shift of her tendons under her skin as she lifts herself on top of the wooden table and leans back on her arms.  The movement of a few other students, also early to the school yard on this morning, hardly catches my eye.  I am far too focused on her.

The curve of her arm entices me, and I wonder what the inside of her elbow would taste and feel like if I ran the flat part of my tongue over it.  With a contented sigh, she crosses her ankles in front of her, drawing my attention down her long, slender legs.  My hands itch to grab her ankles and part them, inhaling the scent of her sex before I delve into her delectable pussy.  Her hair glimmers in the sunshine, and what might look brown to human eyes shows off its strands of gold, burgundy, red…she is captivating.

Other students pass, but only one catches my attention when he stops near her.  It is not until he speak that I realize who he is.

Newton.
***

So...who's the bookie with the odds on Mike's survival?

Oh yeah...

...I like it...

Thank you Amai!

iM an Apple iTech iSupport iBeliever!

For those who were on twitter this morning, you know my day did not start off all that great.  The love of my life, my iPhone, was dropped onto some cement steps.  Thankfully, it looked just fine!  Until I lost my balance and stepped on it.  

The screen shattered, along with my entire day.

You people know how nutty I am about things being "just so." I love my iPhone.  I'm never without it.  Ever.  I sleep with it under my pillow.  Really.

So I went to *nameless cellphone provider*, who said it would be two weeks before they could replace it.  TWO WEEKS??  I'd get the bends!  I even tried to order on online at that point, but the same provider's !!$%#^ website said I had to transfer the whatsit before I could order a something, which I would need for this and that, and then cancelled the whole order and made me start over again.

Three times.

I talked to their "online chat support" which sucks ancient antelope balls.

I finally gave up, decided to brave the holiday traffic, and drive to the Apple Store at the mall.  In December.  

I hate the mall any time of the year.  December just puts the

When I arrived, I'd swear there are 200 people in the store.  I even saw a guy I used to work with hanging out with his wife and trying to con her into buying the "kids" an iPad. I figured I'm going to be there for the night, and would have blogged a "sorry no more updates on Transcendence today" post, but I couldn't type around the screen shatter pattern.

About three minutes after I walk in, a tech comes over.  His name is Casper.   He looks at the shattered phone and asks if I have a problem with the battery.

Ah - humor!  Arr!  Arr!!  (That was a Mork from Orc impersonation, FYI.)

I might use him in a future story.

Casper, not Mork.

To make this long story short, he replaced my phone INCLUDING putting on a new screen protector without a single bubble, in about six minutes.  Not two weeks.  I might have told him I love him.  I'm not sure - it's all kind of a blur now.  I know I was elated.

Mr. Savage has been whining for an iPad.  I told him to go get one.  Get two.  Six.  Whatever.

Casper at the Apple store in Kenwood Mall gets all the points I have to dole out today.  I am again, a happy Savage.

I'll go write some more now... 

My Saturdays

After many, many work related phone calls last night, I have slept in today.  I don't usually do that.  Good for my body, I'm sure, but my prime "the rest of the family is asleep and I can get shit done" time has been thwarted.

Thwart is a funny word.

My daughter is "cheering" her first basket ball game today.  It should be fun!  Then my 16 year old son is having a bunch of friends over to the house, which seems to have become their Saturday routine.  They are a nice bunch of boys, but cost me a fortune in cola, popcorn and pizza.

If you haven't, definitely check out the Tempt My Tongue Reading Group.  It is really interesting!

There should be another chapter of Transcendence out sometime this evening.  Maybe if I get other stuff done a little faster I'll get two out today.  Hope everyone is still enjoying it!

With any luck, I will finish my Christmas shopping today!  Only a couple of people left to do!  I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!